The Six Pillars of Civility - Awareness

Awareness is the third pillar of civility in this series, The Six Pillars of Civility. These fundamental human qualities are all required in equal balance in our lives in order for us to help build and sustain a healthy community. In the fast-paced, time-starved lifestyle many of us choose to follow, being aware of the people and events around us, and how we affect them seems to vanish. I view this as a tragedy and a real danger to any community where civility is the desired tone.

How often are we too busy to congratulate our friends and family for reaching certain milestones and accomplishments in their lives? None of us seems to be immune from this affliction today. We forget birthdays and anniversaries; and we don’t seem to have time to write simple thank you notes. A lot of us can’t even manage to RSVP an invitation. Some might ask, “What’s the big deal?” In my opinion, the “big deal” is the erosion to friendships and important connections that we as human beings desire and need. A healthy society requires many, many connections. None of us can live in a vacuum. We need one another for survival. Does it not make sense for awareness to be a much higher priority in our daily lives? Could we potentially be happier as a result?

I have found that by taking the time to check my surroundings on a regular basis allows me to engage even more attentively with my associates. I can be more conscious of my place in the world and attuned to people and things around me. With awareness comes security and confidence. We cannot forget that as human beings, we make mistakes, we have personal challenges, and we want to succeed. With greater awareness, we accommodate compassion and humility, the first two pillars of civility discussed in these pages previously.

Too often we glide through life, whether at home or at work, with no real sense of what’s happening. Sometimes we are oblivious because we are so wrapped up in our own personal lives that it appears that we don’t actually care about other people. We miss out by elimination, and too narrow a focus.

When this happens in the workplace, feelings of isolation can develop, bringing progress to a screeching halt. It can also impede our ability to succeed in our chosen career. Teamwork is usually a vital component to a healthy and encouraging business environment. Teamwork requires an acute awareness of what our other teammates are doing. Without this finely honed skill, everyone suffers.

Awareness brings to mind two familiar phrases. One is 'deer in headlights'. The other is 'stop to smell the roses'. How often are we caught unawares; and how many times do we feel life is rushing by us too quickly to stop and really enjoy what we are doing, and with whom we are doing it - even if it is ourselves? Slowing down to allow the blur of life to come into focus actually helps us to achieve more of our goals, whatever they may be – a happy family, a successful career, even both?

Taking the time to assess what we are doing, what our real intentions are for doing it, and how this all impacts those around us is how we can live most happily and work most effectively. Awareness leads to respectful interactions with everyone we encounter. This dynamic is essential to maintaining a healthy productive work environment, as well as in familial or social situations. Retaining the best talent in any given circumstance requires awareness, respectful communication, and compassion.

How aware are you of the impact you have on your fellow human beings? Take a step back and examine the importance of awareness. If you want to improve the climate in your life, raise your level of awareness. People will notice.